In Defense of the Duke

I've seen the movie Frozen like a million times by now as has everyone else with children and I've noticed two huge plot holes that seem to be escaping most everyone else. They are as follows.

The Duke of Weselton is the hero of Frozen.

The Good Guy

 He is the representative of Arendelle's largest trade partner (the place where the queen comes from) and his first question is basically, “Hey you guys never call us? WTF?” This isn't an unreasonable question since the lively hood of his people could be in danger. Imagine the anxiety of never knowing whether or not your kingdom was going to have much needed food, timber, or singing rocks (I'm not sure what the chief export is of Arendelle) and it was your job to keep it rolling in. But the people on the other end of the line kept sending your calls direct to voice mail like you were calling from Visa. No wonder the Duke is a little miffed, and he handles it very well, even offering to dance with the Queen and princess.

Later, he orders his men to take out the Queen who has gone all nutty nuts and froze, for all we know, everything. There are no on screen deaths, I mean it's Disney, they usually don't show that kind of thing, just hinting at it and leaving the conclusion to our gruesome imaginations.

Yeah we didn't see Scar get torn apart and eaten alive by Hyenas, but you totally know that it happened. We didn't see Clayton hung from his neck and die on screen in Tarzan, I mean we saw the shadow, and that was pretty shocking for the little ones, but we got the picture. Anyways, we don't see the residents of Arendelle freezing to death or the crops that were destroyed or the countless other tragedies that probably occur when there is a sudden Ice Age, but they are implied. Didn't you see The Day After Tomorrow? Basically all of that shit happened. So yeah, the Duke may have been a bit heartless, but he was trying to save lives of the residents of Arendelle and for all we know, the rest of the world, by taking out Elsa. Remember when Spock said the needs of the many out weigh the needs of the few, same thing.

Towards the end of the movie, Elsa announces that Arendelle is no longer going to be doing any trade with Weselton. I hate to break it to you movie watchers, but after putting her kingdom through a natural disaster, and accidentally murdering no small amount of her own people, it might not be in her best interest to also leave them unemployed. Elsa is kind of a short sighted shitty ruler.

The Trolls are the Villains

Evil Dicks

In the beginning of the movie we see Elsa accidentally freeze Anna's brain. They are then taken to the trolls where we learn that the king of the Trolls has the ability to relieve Elsa of her powers. Instead he chooses not to and encourages her parents to isolate her from all human contact. The parents then fire most of their staff in the castle to ensure that their daughters never learn social skills apparently. 

 That must have been an awkward conversation with the unemployment office by the way.

There seems to be no motivation to allow Elsa to keep her powers by the way. It's not like she needed them to battle a fire breathing dragon that needed to be frozen or something, that would have sort of made sense. The trolls could have spent some time with her teaching her how to control her powers Professor X style, rather than encouraging her to stuff her feelings deep inside and then act surprised when she acted like a 2 liter of diet Coke stuffed with Mentos and capped.

 Also, the trolls kidnap Kristoff. In the beginning of the movie we see a young Kristoff harvesting ice next to adults. He then follows a young Elsa and company to the trolls where he witnesses them magic her up when he is discovered and kidnapped by the trolls. No explanation as to why he is working so young. He could be an orphan, or he could just as easily be working because his parents are ill, we don't know. If that is the case then the trolls just doomed his parents to starve to death after stealing their only child and his reindeer. One troll just things he's cute and says, “I'll keep you.” and we are all supposed to be cool with that. I could go into the fact that it is implied that Kristoff and his reindeer are romantically involved in the song “Fixer Upper” but I won't. The trolls are dicks because they know that she can be dangerous and yet not only do nothing, but seem to ensure that she will someday have a melt down (worst pun ever) by giving the parents shitty counsel.

Before I say good bye I'd like to one last time remind you that we have a few raffle tickets left if you feel like supporting our oldest on her trip to Europe.  You can get more information about that HERE.