For those of you not in the know about parenting a kid with special needs, we have to keep our head on a swivel. All day every day. From the time we wake up to... well also while we are asleep, when we sleep. We don' really sleep. True this can be said of the parenting experience on the whole but I find that the times I let my guard down for Maggie related issues the consequences are especially trying. Take for instance the morning routine.
6:15 Wake up and begin coffee, breakfast, and making lunches.
6:30 Starting waking the 6 year old up.
6:45 Deliver 6 year old her breakfast and first outfit choice.
6:47 Remind 6 year old her breakfast is getting cold and present second outfit choice.
6:49 Dry 6 year old's tears because she hates the first two outfits, remind her that breakfast is getting cold, attempt to find (weather inappropriate) outfit request.
6:55 Reheat breakfast because it's TOO COLD and explain that the requested clothes are dirty but we can wash them for tomorrow. Help 6 year old into outfit choice 1.
7:00 Deliver Maggie's breakfast, turn on Abba Pandora.
7:02 Remind the twins that it's not TV time yet. Attempt 1 at getting boys to eat.
7:09 Remove all art supplies from the 6 year old, remind her that breakfast is going to get cold again and begin the shoe struggle.
7:11 Remind the twins that it's not TV time yet, feeding attempt 2.
7:15 Begin tooth brushing odyssey.
7:20 Take the 6 year old to school
7:30 Remind the twins it's still not time for TV, feeding attempt 3, and get boys dressed... where did you get a sword?
7:35 Help Maggie get dressed.
7:38 Stop the bleeding, seriously, where did you get a sword?
7:45 Put out the fire (for legal reasons please assume that this is a metaphor)
7:50 Begin watching for the bus.
Now we enter the danger zone and where we get the title for this particular blog entry. Part of the deal with having a kiddo with special needs is that the bus picks her up at the house rather than having to strut her out to a bus stop. For the last several weeks the bus has shown up pretty much right at 8:00 am. It's not uncommon that we miss the bus for reasons that are out of our control. The following is not a complete list but should give you an idea of some of the things that can take longer than tem minutes to remedy and may result in Maggie missing the bus.
- Foodmergency (cold)
- Twin Brawl
- Cat-aclysm
- Foodmergency (hot)
- Pokemeltdown
- Pootasrophy
- Apparel mishap
- T.V.engence
- Egg Failure
- Wafflop
- Shoebacle (hot)
- Total System Failure
- Under caffeination
- Udder caffeination
- Laundry adversity
- Act of God (Abrahamic)
- Slips
- Spills
- Band Aid Snobbery
- Act of Gods (Hindu)
- Blatant disregard for authority
- Missing socks
- Blight
- Disco Fever
To be clear, I'm not blaming the bus driver for the days that Maggie misses the bus. Nor do I have a better solution for getting her to school on time. Well, not one grounded in reality at least. But just for fun lets say; drone delivery, self driving car, griffin, and magic banana.
The only reason that this is an Adventure in Maggie Rearing is because I arbitrarily selected Maggie's bus pick up time as a snapshot of our home. It could have just as easily been an adventure in punctuality; but I love that picture of Maggie too much to not use it.
I hope you enjoyed this peak into our home.
Cheers,
L&P
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